…from past experience that when dealing with the ceiling, I must exercise some degree of caution.

Kim and I have been trying to complete little improvement around the house in time for our next visitors (Dad and Sandy – yay!), and as I was wrapping up for the evening, I thought I should just squeeze in one more little chore. There was this patch, see, in the acoustic ceiling cover of the kitchen, see, where the acoustic ceiling had fallen away and left an unsightly reverse-crater.

I had bought a can of the acoustic-ceiling patch, and sure – it was 10:30 at night and I was already pretty tired – but it couldn’t be too hard, and the worst case scenario was to leave it as is. I mean, what could be worse than a reverse-crater in your acoustic ceiling cover.

Hahahaha. Silly hour-younger me! How naive and stupid you were!

Though the instructions on the can were very sparse, I was clever to cut away as much of the loose acoustic ceiling cover as possible, since I figured loose cover wouldn’t stick well in the future. I also had the foresight to pin up a plastic bag to cover the nearby wall, just in case it made a mess. Just in case.

Just in case you don’t know, spraying acoustic ceiling patch is like firing cottage cheese mixed with rubber pellets at the ceiling. Some of the cheese – by the grace of God and laws unbeknownst to physics – actually sticks to the ceiling. But the rubber pellets and the rest of the cheese bounce off even faster than they hit and spatter all over your arm, your shoulders, your glasses, the wall, the chair, the table, the floor, the window shades, the cat, and even a little on the tarp you laid out below. That was annoying, but that wasn’t the real problem.

The real problem was that more of the existing acoustic cover than I had originally thought was loose. And, when it gets covered with new, wet patch, it starts to sag. It starts to pull away from the ceiling.

This is where I became very clever. I thought – maybe if I spray more, it will thicken over and hold everything together.

Hahahahaha. Stupid, stupid Bryan. No – it just pulls even more down.

Here’s what the ceiling looks like now:


(Of course, that’s after most of the newly loose pieces slopped off onto my head, and I cut them away from the ceiling.)

Kim, bless her heart, plugs productively away at painting.